bubbly and lovely: i'm too poor for therapy.
been there and back again. too many thoughts and opinions and hormones get me in trouble.
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7.03.2002
happy campers are we having fun beneath the trees
greetings from camp.
it's 1:30 am and if all is well, i am the only person awake in camp. i just finished my last paper of summer session. it's a week late but not really because the prof extended the deadline. but do you know how hard it is to run a camp and do school 2.5 hours away at the same time? i hope not. it's not fun.
but here i am. this is my first full official week as program director and my insecurities are running high. i'm realizing that "type A personality" does often describe me. i know that i like things perfect, that i'm not effusive, and that i never want to do this job again. i used to be happy. that used to be my name, but now it's just hap and it's indicative of something: that i'm not as happy as i used to be. i'm just older and have more responsibility and that makes me more tired and thus less happy. unless i get so tired that i'm just loopy but that's not my name so i don't know what this is about.
anyhow. so here i am at camp on a really slow connection and i'm the only person awake and it's as humid as a horse's bunghole and i should go to bed. but i'm obsessing about email and it's stupid. but i'm not obsessing about it as badly as i would be if i didn't have 117 girls and 40 something staff members to worry about. it's like camp is edging other things in my brain that take up unnecessary space. which i guess is good.
ok, my eyes are closing. for reals. good night.
01:33
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