bubbly and lovely: i'm too poor for therapy.
been there and back again. too many thoughts and opinions and hormones get me in trouble.
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9.15.2002
insomnia
can't sleep. it's hot. but i refuse to turn the AC on.
i saw some girl giving head to some guy in a parked car. the street was fairly bustling; there were two bars across the street that were pretty busy. it was totally surreal. i mean, stuff like that is better reserved for deserted and desolate parking lots...right?...i guess?
this new zealand plan is almost in the bag. i got my passport photos taken and have my doctor's appointment tuesday. next weekend when i go home i'm going to fax my application in, which includes the payment information. and once it's paid for, well, who's gonna back out? then it's just a matter of the visas and plane tickets. i'm psyched. it's MY TURN for summer camp!
i've thought about living in LA and NY and Boston and a number of other assorted cities after i get back, although tonight NYC is leading the race. maybe i'll just live in a bunch of different places. that's kind of what i think i want to do, but i think the thing that lets me think this (are you following?) is the lack of a relationship. it's not that i want a relationship per se (although sometimes i do, quite honestly) it's just that being single gives me the freedom to do and go wherever i want. (cause who gives a shit about the ole parents?) i like that freedome. i think i'm afraid to give it up, and maybe that's one of my fears of dating. or maybe i'm destined for some terribly domestic and stable life and i have to get all the nomadic stuff out of my system now.
it's really really nice to have the 'd' key back on my keyboard.
04:50
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