10.07.2002
missed fate?
2:30 this morning my phone rings. i am in bed. very exhausted from recovering from my hangover. after four rings, i decide to take the call and as i pick up, so does my machine. i say, "hello?" the male voice on the other end says, "di, guess who this is?" now, this person knows my name so you'd think that i know him, but actually, i say my name on my answering machine message so he could have gotten it from there.
i look at the caller id and it says "unknown caller". i start going through the possibilities but all i can say," who is this?" he replies, "guess". i ask again for the caller to identify himself and again he tells me to guess. i cannot bring up any viable options and i'm kind of freaking out in two ways. maybe it's a weird sexual deviant, maybe it's someone coming to rescue me from the tediousness of my life. in my flustered and exhausted state, all i can do is say, "it's 2:30 in the morning. tell me who this is". and he hangs up.
i return to my interrupted reclining state and i start wondering. was it someone real? was it one of those people i met who perhaps was as enchanted with me as i was with him and he did due diligence on me and found me? well then it'd be kind of rude to call at 2:30 in the morning. perhaps it was someone who found my friend's lost cell phone and called looking for someone to play sexual phone games, have phone sex, something lewd that i'm not into. it's odd that the name didn't show up on caller id because that leads me to think this is less innocent. but then my silly romantic pathetic little brain keeps going back to the first possibility, that i have forever altered the course of my life, missing true love.
eh, well, he should have been able to stand up to my seemingly defiant demand, which really was only masking my flustered and intimidated state.
i guess i will never know.
update: so all day this phone call has put me off. i know it's not much, but it was a little weird. and it's making me recall all the people i have met, like two ships passing in the night, all the way from nasty firemen to texans who swept me off my feet. most unhealthy and slightly off-putting. but i did see igby goes down. great movie.
13:11
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bubbly and lovely: i'm too poor for therapy.
