bubbly and lovely: i'm too poor for therapy.
been there and back again. too many thoughts and opinions and hormones get me in trouble.
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11.04.2002
back
back from puerto rico. am just a little bit darker from spending one afternoon on the beach, all slathered in sunscreen. it was a good time. the tropical weather was just what i wanted. the taekwondo competition could have been a bit better. there was only one other girl in my division. i beat her 1-0 but she tried to cry her way into a dual gold medal as if suddenly the competition had turned into olympic figure skating. what a freaking cry-baby. she kicked me in the head in the first few seconds of the first round but it didn't get scored and after they had already handed out the medals she starts crying about it and holds up the ring for like 10 minutes. at first i felt badly because she was crying and she was pretty tough and she did kick me in the head. but then later i realized that she was being a total pussy. it happens all the time that we get kicks that aren't scored. hell, i had one solid one on her that wasn't scored. i don't feel badly about it at all anymore and in fact, i think she's a total pussy and crybaby. she was whining that one of the reasons she wanted the win was because her boyfriend was there and they had just been fighting about how he didn't want to see her lose. give me a fucking break. take up stripdancing if you're going to do something for your boyfriend you stupid bitch. grr.
i was feeling down about the whole thing at first because i felt like my victory was tarnished and i was leaving p.r. with a tainted win and i started to doubt myself. and i started to remember all the bad things about tkd, how competition makes me insecure and blahblahblah. but then i realized all the above and i felt better but man i'd still love to have the opportunity to go out there and kick her ass one more time, and much more solidly.
but today is monday and monday is the day i tutor in the bronx and that is a good thing.
09:55
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